“The hardest thing is that I only feel bad about not feeling bad.”
Today’s Episode – Loss is Complicated!
There is no cookie cutter approach to dealing with loss. Whether you are someone who recently experienced the death of a family member, or a therapist working with individuals through the bereavement process, how we take this journey is complicated. There is no clear pathway or destination.
Bereavement vs. Bewilderment
I share my own experience of the loss of my father earlier this month. While many will hear my remarks and recoil, I believe it is important to share my journey with openness and honesty. There is healing in transparency.
I have not experienced the, ‘typical,’ bereavement process depicted on television. Oftentimes, the media characterizes loss as self-reflective time with a clear resolution. On the occasion when things don’t go well, bereavement is described as, ‘complicated’ (clinically), with symptoms similar to depression.
In today’s episode, I reflect on my experience of, ‘complicated bewilderment‘. This has been a confusing time – The emotions I have experienced are absolutely lacking. If anything, I feel bad for not feeling bad.
I risk sounding like a sociopath. That is, of course, not the case. I have enough insight at this point in my journey, to understand that my experience is informed by how truly horrible my father was as a person. This is the honest truth, no matter how much it might offend. Going to social media and attempting to rewrite history through platitudes of what a great man he was, feels reprehensible.
Have Your Say!
We love listener feedback. Did today’s episode affect you in a particular way? Have you had a similar experience?
Leaving feedback is easy! You can either contact us directly from the Finding My Psych Website contact page.
Resources Mentioned In Today’s Episode
As mentioned, if you are looking for a great starting place in your studies on bereavement, read, “On Death and Dying,” by Elisabeth Kubler-Ross. This ground breaking work walks you through the relative stages of loss.